Those who follow true crime know that there are crimes that break your heart and crimes that make you mad. Then there are crimes that manage to do both. netflix Documentary Series, Sins of Our Motherit is firmly in the latter category.
The Hand That Rocks the Cradle
Sins of Our Mother explores the series of events that led to a supposedly loving mother, Lori Vallow, murdering two of her children. She (she Supposedly, at least, she has yet to be found guilty in a court of law). Even if you’re not a fan of true crime, you’ve almost certainly heard the name Vallow. In 2019, Vallow’s two missing children, Tylee and JJ, were all over the news. People were outraged to discover that her mother, Lori, was getting married on a beach while her children were missing.
As the search progressed, everyone feared the worst. And rightfully so, as their bodies were eventually discovered and her mother (along with her husband, Chad Daybell) was charged with her murders.
As is often the case when parents are accused of murdering their children, people couldn’t help but ask why. Why would Lori kill her children? What could drive a mother to commit such a horrible crime? However, it would later be revealed that the murder of the Vallow children was nowhere near the beginning of the story.
the end of days
Weather Sins of Our Mother explores Chad Daybell’s role in the murders, the Netflix documentary series focuses primarily on Lori. Viewers are taken through her past, her various relationships, and her eventual attraction to a doomsday cult. She explores his delusions about angels and his self-proclaimed purpose. The documentary does not shy away from the reality that Lori Vallow is not mentally well. Which may be the reason for her actions, but it’s not an excuse for her actions.
What’s particularly galling about Vallow’s story is the realization that it didn’t have to end this way. There were numerous opportunities for people to intervene. Her husband, whom her brother murdered long before her children were killed, saw the danger grow. However, no one listened. Not the police. Not the therapist who evaluated Vallow during an engagement period. And not the friends who heard Vallow talk about her conspiracy theories and didn’t chime in.
Now, it is absolutely true that hindsight is 20/20. It is also important to remember that people with mental illness are more likely to be victims of crime than perpetrators. Vallow’s delusions were wacky, but it’s still a bit of a jump from “I See Angels” to Family Annihilator. It might even be a small leap to go from accusations about “dark spirits” to child murderers. But seeing how the story ends, you still want to scream. Someone I should have seen things spiral. If not before her husband, Charles, was murdered, at least after. But of course we’re watching the documentary because no one did.
Trials and Tribulations
The first episode of the Netflix documentary focuses on Vallow’s past, up to the point of her husband’s death. The second episode focuses on the events leading up to Tylee and JJ’s death and the subsequent search to find them. Delve deeper into Vallow’s romance with Daybell (and the mysterious death of her first wife). Her belief in “zombies”. And her growing affiliation with the doomsday cult. The final episode focuses on Daybell’s trial, the determination of Vallow’s lack of competence, and her utter lack of remorse.
The last is perhaps the hardest part to listen to. It is unbearable to think that a mother can murder her children. It is unthinkable to think that she would not regret doing it. But she apparently believed her children were “zombies,” and even in jail, it’s clear she doesn’t believe they were still her children at the time of her murder.
I can’t conceive of doing the things Vallow did. And understanding the possible reason for his actions, his inability to fully comprehend the reality of his actions, doesn’t take away from the seriousness of what he did. Again, supposedly. What happened with JJ and Tylee is tragic. The fact that (almost) no one saw the warning signs before it was too late is outrageous.
At the end of the final episode of the documentary, it is noted that earlier this year, Vallow was finally declared competent to stand trial, which is scheduled for 2023. If her mental state has recovered to the point where she is once again legally competent , you may now have the ability to understand the seriousness of your actions.
If the accusations against him are true, then he murdered two of his sons. I can’t imagine doing what she did, but I know she could never live with myself if she did.
Sins of Our Mother Premiere on Netflix on September 14.