Feature: Top 10 Cheekface Lyrics

Aware: by the publisher

Cheekface is a band that makes it hard to pick your favorite lyrics. These songs are full of clever metaphors, relatable sentiments, and nods to their fans (officially known as “cheekfreaks”). Somehow they can be legitimately funny while holding a mirror in the darkness of a late-stage capitalist society where everything is in order. fire. They make existential crises catchy, worm-worthy apocalyptic musings.

My brain can’t classify the things I love, so this list is in chronological order by album. There are too many perfect one-liners, satirical jokes, and humorous mantras to fit into a list like this, but we hope they inspire you to dive into the Cheekface catalog and find the lyrics you love.

therapy island

“I just say I’m sorry when I’m wrong now”

I just say I’m sorry when I’m wrong now

I only run the air when it’s hot

Now I only text friends I like

I only talk trash if I thought about it

everything is fine, nothing is on fire

I already burned it all and now it’s just ashes

I only drive the car if I can’t walk

I just say I’m sorry when I’m wrong now

I had to put this one on the list because the title has become a mantra for me. There is wisdom in Cheekface’s songs, and this one is a gem. I sing too “Everything is fine, nothing is on fire” in my head all the time.

“Sexy National Anthem”

Are you just starting out in welding?

Well, I think it will do wonders for your industrial credibility.

I’m sleeping with my eyes open

mixing ZOLOFT and smartwater to make NyQuil for the soul

Sexy National Anthem is such a danceable track that it sometimes distracts from the lyrics. But inevitably, as you sing along, these lyrics will hit you and make you laugh. It’s also possible that you inexplicably feel like soldering something.

“Great White Destruction”

adult recreation and I’m losing every time

And if winning is half the battle

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I’ll take the other half, okay

there are a bunch of random rich guys on Male Feminists The Band

and, as Sufjan Stevens sang, “I want to hold your fucking hand”

now i’m dead, i sell my krill vinyl

Cheekface is really good at taking common sayings and turning them on their head or making them mean something different all together,”and if winning is half the battle / I’ll take the other half, okay.” is a perfect example of that. Also, there is a Krill reference. Krill forever.

Emphatically not.

“Listen to your heart.” “Nope.”

my hall of fame

And panic is the sport I play

We always play on Saturday.

you and me both in uniform

Wherever we go, we take our huge folding chairs

I guarantee you I wasn’t the only one who burst out laughing for “aAnd panic is the sport I play. It’s a relatable lyric for many of us, and making us laugh at ourselves makes us feel less alone. Also, the image of carrying huge folding chairs everywhere (CVS, the DMV, a Cheekface show) is hilarious.

“(I don’t want to go to) Calabasas”

What makes a man want to be a referee, demanding of others a standard that he does not meet?

My security deposit was not returned to me

Carpet damage is a matter of degrees.

I can’t stop thinking about the referee’s line. It’s so smart. I wake up in the middle of the night and say “yeah, what makes a man want to do that?” and then my cat tells me to go back to sleep.

“Original Composition”

Standing on an X: the X where you will see the sun set over humanity

The Spaghetti-O exploded in the microwave window of heaven

Life itself is a preexisting condition, an original composition, a limited edition, an invitation to return to destiny.

Let’s see what chaos visited humanity today while on vacation

Here we are with another creative but correct metaphor, the end of us described as something we can visualize immediately but also winking at the meaninglessness of our existence to the rest of the vast universe. Yes, the apocalypse is coming, but I have to go get some Spaghetti-O’s right now.

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too much to ask

“I feel so weird!”

Something familiar every day starts to seem strange when you repeat it and repeat it and repeat it and repeat it

The difference between a dog and me is that I am taller.

Think about it. She just thinks about it.

Lyrics about dissociation combined with that big dog punchline? Chef’s kiss.

“Featured Singer”

I want to be the featured singer in an EDM song.

Wedding DJs will rock when requested

Spin Magazine, The Needle Drop and Reader’s Digest won’t even review it

But kids will choreograph elaborate dances with my voice on TikTok

I think Cheekface could make an EDM song that kids would dance to on TikTok. It would be the catchiest EDM song ever and The Alternative would definitely cover it.

“Commitment Campaign”

Statistically likely to wear a shirt

A shirt so white and starched you could spill coffee on it.

Statistically likely you’re trying to stay hydrated (but not that hydrated)

no one is mad at me

no one is mad at me

no one is mad at me

no one is mad at me

The first line will make you laugh, the manic chant of “northone is angry with me” It will make you and your dysphoria and rejection sensitivity sing.


A great cup of noodles!

A giant cup of noodles!

Greg screaming this at the top of his lungs at the climax of this song makes the whole album for me. Perfect song, 10/10.

jami hunter | @audiocurio

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